Cleared for Field Ops

--against my better judgment

Being interviewed for a field job I wasn’t sure I wanted. Decided to be honest as to minimize my chances for success. Let fate rule the outcome. Interviewer was a young Marine Captain with lots of salad on his chest:

He didn’t care for the answers I had put on the form: “Says here, you were hit by car once; almost drowned twice - both by misadventure; wounded by accident and may have risked yours saving someone else’s life in a war-zone, though you had been drinking at the time... You think that’s combat experience?” -- I shrugged: “And don’t forget sir, I did all this while enduring a life-long existential condition in which I could be overwhelmed with either anxiety or hilarity.” -- “You’re shitting me right?” -- “Oh, no... There have been times I have just missed death or injury by moments and have burst out laughing. At other times I might have cowered in bed over a premonition... Sometimes, I’m just not sure what’s real.

He made a face. “I’m not big on comedians, Sergeant; or ex-Sergeant. -But your record’s clean and performance reports ok or better. And you won’t be in MY outfit... this ain't official but what's your religion?" -- "Used to be a deconstructionist Old Believer; but now, let's say Protestant," I claimed. Couldn't tell if he was smirking or just looking sour. --"What denomination?" He asked. --"Salvation Army (naturally)." He thought a moment and nodded: "I’m gonna pass you on up. Just one question...”  -- “Yes, sir?” -- “What was that mouthful of bullshit; exit-sensualism?” --  I rephrased: “With me PTSD may have been a pre-existing condition. I may have been born with it” -- He made an unpleasant face: “Well, then for you, doing anything was above and beyond.” -- I nodded. -- “Maybe you should have put in for a medal; but I wouldn’t give it to you.” -- I half-heartedly accepted his recommendation. I believe that Marines do have a purpose in the universe, I’m just not certain of its extent.